Beena Agarwal

New Dynamics Of Man-Woman Relationship In Divakaruni’s Arranged Marriage

 

            Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni within the canvass of the collection of short stories Arranged Marriage (1996) has successfully painted the shifting pattern of man and woman relationship. It is attributed, “Each story is complete in itself, together they create a tapestry as colourful, as delicate and as enduring as the finest silk sari.” (Indented on the back page of Arranged  Marriage). Each story is a microscopic representation of familial relations, redefining new cultural spaces. In the wake of globalisation, the sanctity of family as an institution has been under the process of social change and it has prepared the fabric of man and woman relationship challenging the authority of patriarchy and resisting the irrational hold of religion and moral myths. Such dynamics of relationship assumed significant proportion in the literary texts coming from those who witnessed the apathy of cultural alienation. It has been accepted, “literature reflects accepted patterns of thoughts, feelings and action, including patterns of expressions and society. It innovates giving expressions to emerging themes, that may yet not be defined in literal terms” (Albrect 425-36). The diverse shades of man and woman relationship constitute the central pattern of narrative in the Arranged Marriage.

The very first story “The Bats” is written in the mode of self-revelation where the narrator is curious to draw the conclusions about the secrets of the life of her parents. The silent sobbing of her mother persistently haunts her conscience. In this story, there is little space for ethical consideration of traditional marriage and the focus remains on the issue that the frictions in marital relationship brings a greater chaos in the life of children.

The story “Clothes” is a sensitive story in which dresses and the colour of dresses are used as a metaphor of life. Sunita, the chief narrator is a prospective bride. She weaves her own pattern of dreams of being an American wife, leaving behind the burden of traditional Indian society. The fantasy of migration overwhelms her. She has a fascination of shopping at American malls. Her father buys a specific blue saree for her bride viewing ceremony. Somesh, her husband has adjusted in the alien culture where the habits of drinking and sexual harassment are usual course of actions. Sunita hesitates to wear T-shirt and Jeans that “outlines” her breasts. Against Indian code of feminity, she nurtures her own dreams of professional life. The second part of the story is tragic and poignant. Suddenly, she is directed to wear ‘White’ widow’s colour. The dead body of Somesh is brought, covered in white. He is killed in terrorist activity. She recalls how Somesh was disgusted with night shifts. American dream and intoxication of liberal life prove hurdlesome. Divakaruni concludes that the shift of cultural spaces has posed greater challenges and hazards for marital harmony.

The story “Silver Pavements, Golden Roofs”, is a sentimental account of the matrix of home and homelessness. The issue of man and woman relationship has gone in background. Through the experiences of a young migrant Jayanti, Divakaruni broods on the perils of the lives of migrants. Jayanti planned to stay with Aunt Pratima, her mother’s younger sister. Her uncle, Bikram finds it difficult to survive there and leads the life of a marginalised. Pratima also considers that distinctive cultural spaces are ruining their marital life. She becomes restless to return home and desperately cries out, “I want my childhood again” (5). The quest to review childhood implies the need of reconstruction of traditional ideology to ensure peace and joy.

In the story, “The Word Love”, Divakaruni presents the issue of how mother images persist in the life of the girl after marriage. The narrator selects her own married life beyond the choices of her mother. This radical decision brings a sense of guilt and self-repentance. Her own guilt subsequently casts its shadows on their married life. Her constant self-accusation induces a rare self-condemnation in the mind of the husband, “you’re acting like I was some kind of criminal”(58). Her excessive absorbance in the mother image paves a way for breach in their married life. It was her association with past that does not allow her to compromise with her present. There are ample evidences in the story when in the moments of excitement husband demands love and passion but her attention shifts to the apathy of her mother. She becomes frantic. She picks up the phone in anticipation of a call from her mother. She lives in two distinctive spaces simultaneously, past (mother image) and present (marital harmony) without any symmetrical equation of the two. She has a realisation, “Things are not going well between him and you either. Sometimes when he is talking the words make no sense” (67). The fractured images of life render her weak and helpless. Her husband desperately admits, “It was never me, was it? Never love. It was you and her, her and you.” (70) Being disgusted, she decides to desert both the husband and the mother for the realisation of the real pleasure of life. Divakaruni admits that man and woman relationship cannot be perfect or balanced without the absolute faith between the two, making them a single unit.

The title of the story “A Perfect Life” is ironical because it contains the idea that the illusion of perfection is the greatest illusion of human life. In this story Divakaruni ventures to record the crisis of a woman who willingly suppresses the instincts of motherhood but this self-suppressed motherhood subsequently seeks consolation in the company of a seven-year-old child. She calls him “Krishna”, a symbolic and cosmic image of lost motherhood. Here Divakaruni with her narrative art encompasses the socio-psychological view of motherhood, the inevitable component of female identity. It has been accepted, “to the traditional woman, matrimony is incomplete without motherhood. Motherhood is regarded as ‘biological destiny’ of a woman. A child is considered to be woman’s happiness and her justification through which she is supposed to find self-fulfillment and self realization”(Sunil 158). Meera, the narrator, is the native dweller of Calcutta but lives at Golden Gate Bridge with her friend Richard. She prefers unconventional American life and living. She finds herself emancipated to enjoy her life in the company of Richard beyond the conventional fear of pregnancy. She maintains her own autonomy in the selection of her own sexual life. In spite of being unmarried, she seeks culmination of her desires in the company of an unknown child. Both Sheela and Richard discourage the possibilities of adoption and call it “stupid”. It was Richard’s first imposition of his masculine authority on Meera. She comes to the realisation that Richard’s male ego was not different from Indian males. He says, “May be what you need is a child of your own” (89). The intricacy of adoption ruins her dream of perfect life. She becomes nostalgic with the realisation, “how strange the nature of love is and how strangly it transforms people” (97). Motherhood overpowers all other considerations in her life, “Mother-love, that tidal wave, swept everything else away. Friendship, romantic fulfillment. Even the need for sex” (98-99). The thwarted motherhood transforms into rebellion. Divakaruni admits that man and woman relationship constantly shapes and reshapes with reference to other relations.

“The Maid Servant Story” is a long story, focussed around the complexity of man and woman relationship. Manisha a young Bengali girl visits California to stay with her aunt who was anxious for her marriage. She had a passion for Bijoy, a professor at the University of California. Manisha has an obsession that the mental spaces for her mother do not correspond with her dreams and desires. Manisha wanted, “liberated relationship for no string attached.” Manisha plans to wear a saffron saree but ‘saffron’ colour revitalizes several images in her mind. She recalls how she used to live with her sister during her second pregnancy. Her sister arranges a maid to manage the household affair. She gave her a name “Sarla”. The formal relationship with Sarla starts assuming the dimension of personal relationship and gradually the maid starts dominating the wife. Here Sarla’s excessive interference poses threat to their relationship. She said, “the maid loved the wife in the way intelligent animals love their keepers, with a ferocious and total loyalty and forgetting of self” (124). The sister warns her, “Small thing leads to big problems” (126). One day, the wife requested the maid to wear a saffron saree. It gives a new look and view to her beauty and personality. This saffron saree changed the life of the wife. In that saree, in husband’s life, the maid became a substitute of wife. While the wife was in hospital, with perfect peace, the maid was being used by the husband. In both cases the maid and the wife were the objects of sexual exploitations. The sister’s innocence and husband’s treachery stands in sharp contrast and prepares a pattern of doubts. “The thought of acting on her own, of setting in motion some uncontrollable force that might eventually shatter her sister’s marriage, …filled her with dread” (147). Being unaware of Sarla’s tragedy, she still craves for her company – Sarla in order to get rid of guilt left the home but even after a lapse of one year, she was craving for the companionship. The wife almost becomes hysterical with the realisation, “It was Sarla” (161). Now Manisha gets a realisation, “the events could have happened to my own mother. The child that died of cholera, along with my father, was a boy. He could well have been the baby in the story, and I the little girl” (161). The tragedy of Manisha has to justify that for a woman love and faith are the primary creeds of man and woman relationship.

In the story “Doors”, Divakaruni contemplates the issue of marriage, personal relationship and cross-cultural crisis. She proceeds with the assumption that geography positively contributes to the mode of relationship. The narrative is focused on the life of Preeti, the “westernized Indian” and her husband Deepak an “Indianised American”. Their marital life suffers a crisis with the appearance of Raj, Deepak’s college friend. In this story, “Doors” is a symbolic representation of private spaces while an open door or no door is a sign of cosmic realisation. Preeti was discouraged from marriage with an Indian against her own progressive American life. The identical counseling was given to Deepak but he was proud of his dynamic and liberal outlook, needed for the marital adjustment. “Women aren’t dolls or slaves. I want Preeti to make her own decisions. I’m proud that she’s able to” (185). With the appearance of Raj, the attention of Deepak shifts to him. His informal style, warmth and intimacy was a suffocation for Preeti. For Raj, ‘home’ is a concept beyond the calculation of bedroom and drawing room. The concept of door did not exist in the universe of Raj. The retrieval of memories of the past made Deepak to assimilate in the life style of Raj wihout caring for the sentiments and Americanised habits of Preeti. Each liberty enjoyed by them is taken as a serious jerk to the identity and personal relationship of Preeti. She thinks, “It can’t be forever, he can’t stay with us forever, I can’t put up with it until he leaves, and then everything will be perfect again” (98). Divakaruni communicates that traditions and past, are the positive components in deciding and designing the pattern of marriage. In the cross-cultural marriages, the relations are usually weak and helpless.

The story “Meeting Mrinal” is an argument on the age long conflict between ‘domesticity’ and ‘female freedom’ beyond domesticity. Divakaruni is convinced that the concept of family is integrated in feminine psyche, though it sometimes clashes with the concept of individual freedom. The narrative is focused round the life of two friends Asha and Mrinal, representing two distinctive spaces of female existence. Asha is married but finds her family a hurdle in her freedom and progress. For her freedom comes in the form of divorce. She gets divorce but simultaneously develops a guilt for what she has done. Mrinal, inspite of a perfect professional life, desperately suffers for family life and male companionship. Asha, after divorce, was apprehensive about the responses of her own adolescent son, Dinesh. She found household confinement, a burden for self development and freedom. Besides, socio-psychological issues, financial crisis challenges her. She was forced to get a job to meet the expenses of family. Asha recalls how Mrinal used to guide her that woman’s happiness does not consist in marriage, home and family. She also used to exhort her to be economically independent. Asha thought Mrinal is happier in her career, freedom, and economic independence and enjoys a ‘perfect existence’. As soon as Mrinal unveils the layer of her consciousness, it comes out that she was craving for family. Mrinal’s loneliness is reflected in, “you don’t know how lucky you are Ashoo, to have such a loving and considerate husband, such a good responsible son” (294), As a foil to Mrinal, Asha’s definition of marriage was entirely different, “But you’re lucky too, you’re doing so well in your career, traveling whenever you want, moving up in the company, never having to worry about money” (294). In this respect both Mrinal and Asha have a craving for the fulfillment of life in the form of relationship. Divakaruni while dealing with the sentimental issue, tackles the issue with certain philosophical justifications. In man and woman relationship, all equations arrive at nothingness.

The story “Affairs” is written around the life of two bosom friends who live in the progressive society of America. Subsequently their over indulgence created fractions in their marital relationship. With the appearance of Meena, a new triangle emerges in their relationship. It was told to Abha that Meena was having an affair. Such revelation  disturbs Abha and she finds herself betrayed. She lives in family and for her the concept of ‘affair’ was the transgression of marital fidelity. She admits, “Sex for me was a matter between married people, carried out in the silent privacy of their bedroom and resulting, hopefully, in babies” (294). The expression of Ashok, appreciating the beauty and frankness of Meena shakes her conscience and she has a realisation  of her loss in her spaces from kitchen to drawing room and from drawing room to bed room. Meena is childless and for her loneliness she starts seeking a consolation in the company of Ashok. The intimacy of Ashok and Meena brings a greater insecurity and loneliness in the life of Abha. She confesses, “I hadn’t loved Ashok all these years not really, though I believed. I had been too busy being a good house-wife” (249). Abha and Srikant both were lonely in their own way. The resentment of Abha against Meena transforms into anger. After such crisis she becomes restless to discover of her own potentiality and her own realisation of freedom. Abha develops a myth that Ashok is the person with whom Meena was having an affair. Like a traditional Indian wife she suffers with a sense of insecurity. “I wondered how many women were lying sleepless like me through the night dark, eyes burning from tears that would not come, because their husbands were having affairs with their best friends.” (265) As soon as Meena hears Ashok’s name from Abha’s lips, she is stupefied. Meena gets an insight into the consciousness of Abha and tries to convince that she preferred the company of Ashok only because Ashok is the person who understands her. Divakaruni seems to be in search of a pattern of man and woman relationship where instead of inter dependent, there should be independent identities. Meena views the whole things in terms of the clash of individual and society. She searches for the real happiness only in a freedom beyond the convention.

The last story “Ultrasound” presents a suggestive account of female identity, idea of motherhood, resisting patriarchy, the psycho-biological complexity concerning with the issues like pregnancy, abortion and female desire to select her own sexual life. The flux of narrative shifts in the duality of experiences of maidenhood and the burden of matrimony. Divakaruni develops the narrative with the assumption, if motherhood is a female prerogative, it should not be guided by socio-cultural perspective. Runu, the narrator and Arundhati, her friend, both are pregnant. Both are anxious about the development of their pregnancy. Both are waiting for their reports of ultrasound. They were married at the same time, and planned their pregnancy. However, one day Runu asks her husband, “Will you be just as happy, if it is a girl” (206). In contrast to her, Arundhati is living under the domination of her mother in-law. Arundhati feels a perpetual loss of her identity, status and feminity. The persistent anxiety of Renu is the realisation of the horrors of the consequences of revelation of ultrasound. Divakaruni asserts that pregnancy is not a passing phase in the life of a woman but it is triumph of her marital life, the whole question of female identity. As soon as it is revealed that Renu would have a girl child, she is forced by her in-laws for a compulsive abortion. Her mother-in-law is swayed by the myth that eldest child of Bhattacharyaji’s household should not be a female child. Even her threat of suicide was of no avail. In these crucial conditions, a woman is no better than a bird without wings.

The inferences drawn in the paper can be accepted as an argument in defence of the narrative art of Divakaruni, marked by rare elasticity, profound sensitivity and authenticity. She deals with the phenomenon of man and woman relations not made by fragmentation but working as a whole representing the constant flux of emotional clashes born out of the shift of geography and cultural transformation. She seems to establish that it is, and it should be accepted that traditions are the foundation of human behaviour and all modification of the pattern of human relationship must have its base on tradition. Beneath the surface of the dynamics of marital harmony, she successfully represents the issues like gender identities, issue of motherhood and socio-cultural and psycho-philosophical perspectives of feminine psyche, built out of the migration of culture. Arranged Marriage is a microscopic scanning of the complexity, creeping up in the wake of globalization, working as a compulsive force in search of a new definition and dimension of man and woman relationship.

 

 

WORKS CITED

Albrect, Milton C. “The Relationship of Literature and Society”, American Journal of Sociology LIX,          No. 5, (March 1954).

Divakaruni, Chitra Banerjee. Arranged Marriage. Black Swan, 1997. All Subsequent references from         the text are cited from this edition only.

Sunil, Seema. Man and Woman Relationship in Indian Fiction. New Delhi: Prestige Publication.